Guest Blog: Family mediation- the power of the “third side”

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This week’s guest blog is from Jill:

Sometimes we think fighting is just “what kids (or adults) do,” rather than a way we engage when our needs aren’t getting met. I prefer to think of engaging peacefully as “what we do,” and that when we get off track, we can use a hand to get back to a place of connection.

I remember when my son was about three, his dad was in a bread-making phase. Sometimes I liked the results, and sometimes I didn’t. While at the local farmer’s market, my son and I found a particularly yummy loaf of walnut bread, and brought it home discreetly. When his dad saw it, he became incredulous. read more

Guest Blog: “Vacationing” family style

happy family portrait having funThis week’s guest blog is by Mindy:

After I had my first baby my neighbor told me that I can no longer call it “going on vacation” if kids are involved, and that she refers to it as traveling or taking a trip.  It took me a couple years and many attempts at vacationing with kids to fully grasp what she meant.

A vacation implies a break, and traveling with young kids, especially more than one, is anything but that.  In fact, in nearly every way it is more difficult, more work, and more exhausting than staying home .  Labeling the trip as a vacation is really just setting yourself up for disappointment as it seems even more painful to be up in the middle of the night with a crying baby or time-zone-wacked toddler when you’re paying $200 a night for the “experience” in lodging alone. read more

Guest Blog: So, Who’s Calling the Shots? And How?

brar01_kazdinThis week’s guest blog is by Kheyala:

I was a kid – a very good kid – who knew what it was like to be raised on a very short leash.  For this reason, when I had my own little one, I was more than committed to allowing her the freedom which I had been denied.  The trouble was, by the time she’d reached a year and a half, I found myself with a little tyrant running my house.  Or should I say her house!

I thought to myself, “Oh my gosh.  I cannot imagine what the ‘terrible twos’ will bring, let alone the teenage years, when this is what I’ve got to reckon with now!”  That was the moment this insight came to me; a beautiful, timeless insight that remains true to this day (she’s 12 now) and has proved since to be just as extraordinarily effective and beneficial for every other child who as fallen under my care. read more

Sleep deprivation is no joke!

A_Very_Sleepy_Mom_Carrying_Her_Screaming_Baby_and_a_Bottle_Royalty_Free_Clipart_Picture_091013-003989-741053About a year ago I read an interesting article in a magazine about a rat study that showed that rats that were deprived of sleep died sooner than rats that were deprived of food.  Wow, I knew sleep was important, but I had no idea that going without it could actually kill animals faster than going without food would.

Sleep deprivation makes a huge impact on all sorts of brain functions.   Recent studies have shown marked negative impacts on mood, cognitive performance and motor function in people who are sleep deprived.  One study I read stated that “profound neurocognitive deficits accumulate over time” in people who are deprived of sleep. read more

Creating the emotional state you want, it’s easier than you might think!

eva_summersaultToday I want to share something I learned from NLP (otherwise known as neuro-linguistic programming) called a “state change”.  We’re always in some sort of emotional state, whether happy, sad, excited, or frustrated.  And often it feels like we’re at the whim of our emotions.  When I’m frustrated it seems like there is no way to transform the frustration into something else.  But there is!  We can consciously create a “state change” in ourselves and often in others, pretty much any time we want! read more