How can I keep my independent two-year-old safe?

My friend Mindy had a recent challenge with her two-year-old son. She wrote:

Shelly, We have a big challenge. I like to leave our doors open to the backyard, so Thomas and the animals (we have two dogs and a cat) can go in and out as they wish.

Today Thomas crawled under the automatic gate into the front yard!

Then he came around to the front door and played a game out of it. But I’m terrified he is going to go near the street or in it, or someone is going to snatch him. I really can’t watch him well enough now that I have Tabitha (3 mo.) to ensure he won’t do it again, and there is no way to alter the gate to prevent his tiny little body from going under it. What do I do? read more

How Rocking, Spinning, and Swinging Your Kids Helps Them Pay Attention

Ever wonder why we have the impulse to rock babies to help them calm down?

Studies show that rocking, spinning and other physical movement through space helps children’s brain development and their ability to pay attention, by stimulating the vestibular (inner ear) system.

And here’s the thing, this works with both infants and older kids. It can also be a really fun way for you to cut lose and play with your kids.

So, the next time your little guy is about to lose it, check with him about whether it sounds fun, and then spin around with him in your arms, or take him to a nearby swing-set. read more

Five Keys to Getting Kids to Help with Clean-up

Ever wonder why you can’t get your kids to help clean up?

I know, it seems like a nice idea and all, but how the heck do you actually get kids to want to and enjoy helping with clean up?

At first, I didn’t think it was possible either. But it turns out, I was grossly underestimating young people.

In fact, during my first year as a preschool teacher in a Montessori school, my limited ideas of the kids’ cleaning capabilities were completely blown out of the water!

I looked around the classroom and saw three-year-olds sweeping, mopping, dusting, and helping each other clean up messes! read more

The big secret of loving yourself: A Valentine for mothers

All my life I have felt ambivalent about many of the labels available to describe me or my life: Woman. Bisexual. Wife. Even “Mother.” Not because I don’t have a womb, don’t love people of many genders, have not been a committed partner, or am not a parent, but because of how I disidentify with some of the assumptions that other people attach to these words.

These days, I don’t care as much about what other people attach to words they think describe me. But on this week approaching Valentine’s day, I warmly invite all parents, especially female parents (however you define that), to love ourselves. read more