I’ve worked for YEARS to grow as a person, to understand myself, my emotions, and my reactions to the things that happen to me. I know how to understand and express my emotions responsibly, resolve conflicts, and use positive redirection to help my child thrive. But that doesn’t make me perfect and it certainly doesn’t stop all the crazy thoughts my mind decides to think.
I think every parent fantasizes about harming his or her child at one point or another. If you say you haven’t, I don’t believe you for a minute. Maybe it’s just a fleeing thought of pinching them, or a long consideration about spanking them, “for their own good.” Perhaps it’s a thought about smothering their cries or a morbid image of tossing them out of a moving car. Of course we would never DO these things. But that doesn’t mean we don’t think about it.